I saw the above bumper sticker this morning.  And while I couldn’t argue with the first part, I had to question the logic of the second part.  I mean, to my alcoholic way of thinking, shouldn’t you numb yourself before entering into a situation that’s going to suck?  I mean, talk about putting the cart before the horse.

Step 2:  Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

When I’m not in a good mind space, work becomes nothing more than a series of put-upons.  New projects that materialize out of nowhere and are due ASAP clog my inbox.  And really, what other way is there to do business than ASAP?  None.  Clients make impossible demands, salespeople say yes sir, yes sir, yes sir, and employees get to work late and be grateful to have a job.  It’s getting so bad out there that any idiotic idea proposed by a higher-up gets the immediate green-lit, for fear of not being a team player.  I just spent two hours in a brainstorming session for a free food sampling station tagline for a grocery store.  The winner, and the phrase that was seen as the clear-cut favorite?  That’s Tasty.

So how can this alcoholic take any of it seriously?  I mean, I’m learning how not to get upset about the little things, the big things, and all things in between.  So pardon me if I’m not “super-jazzed” to discuss the strategy behind yet another new stuffing that Oreo is trying out.  I mean, holy shit, watermelon?  And it’s not that it’s a good or bad idea, it’s just that it is.  That it exists, and that so many people are running around getting stressed and angry and belligerent, all because of a limited edition wafer cookie’s glop center, is what’s causing me to question the purpose of life.

Yes, this all comes off as Cadillac complaints.  I know.  Thanks to this program, I now have much more appropriate outlets for my business world gripes and obscenity-laden outbursts.  Places where saying these things won’t get me fired.

Today, I’m grateful:  I’ve got many places to turn to.

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