There has been an idea knocking around my head as of late, this idea of spray painting my metal simian lawn ornament that I purchased at a flea market back in 2000.

Step Seven: humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.

He wears blue jeans with a vest. No shirt, and with his right hand raised in forward motion, it’s as though he works at Ace Hardware, and has noticed that confused look on your face.  He has a saddle on his back, for the children.  I painted him solid blue, in accordance with my two favorite sports teams.

Mr. Monkey is 0-28 in the good luck charm championship department over these last fourteen years. And it’s not as though I didn’t invest my effort and time building up the superstition.  I’d point him in the direction of whichever city my team was visiting. On off-days, or just to change the team’s fortunes, I’d sometimes place him in spots around the yard I thought would make him happy, resulting in positive vibrations that would influence a professional sporting event.  I have, on occasion, had to remind him who’s boss.  Though he weighs a solid 25 pounds, he’s easily made airborne, particularly following crushing defeats.  I’ve left him upside down in a snowbank once for over a week, just to teach him a lesson.

Now, after all this time, I’m wondering if the problem isn’t the color.

So I must ask myself a question that just got much, much bigger on me:  Are superstitions grandiose forms of ego?  Is attaching inconsequential thoughts and actions to real-life outcomes halfway across the country doing my right-sizedness any good?  It can be more than a little confining, adhering to my made-up rules.

Lesson for today: Root, root, root with all my heart, but understand that creating coincidences and then proclaiming them super all thanks to my actions is literally bragging myself up about nothing.

One thought on “painting my monkey.

  1. On the other hand, it’s only a monkey, probably follows rule 62, and has no more control than we do. Hey, if it’s bad luck, maybe paint it Green and Yellow and point it north.

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