I take late lunches. The later the better: it makes the afternoons fly. Lately, I’ve been taking early lunches, because I’m finding that there is a limit as to how long I can listen to my new office neighbors discuss ex-husbands, custody battles, and the latest episode of Their Favorite Reality Television Program.
Step 11: sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.
If God saw me to it, he’ll see me through it. I believe that’s how the saying goes. He was right in thinking that I don’t like interacting with people in general, so sticking me out among general people is one way to go, I guess. I’ve been told that the forced interaction will be good for me, and I don’t doubt it. I just wonder how good it will be for those around me.
See, my level of loud, hyper-kinetic behavior has been stabbed in the eye for the sake of non-disruption. No music, no singing along, no tapping my foot; just a slow build of energy that can’t be released through something as simple as bouncing in my chair (good Lord, the squeaking!).
In a nutshell, I can’t be myself. And when I have to concentrate on being quiet and subdued, I become quiet and subdued. My work slows to a consistent, assembly line mentality with no bursts of imagination or creativity. I’m only doing what I’m told and waiting for the day to end. Thankfully, I work from home on Tuesdays and Thursdays, so any back-to-back monotony can be somewhat avoided.
Today: Adapt and adjust, my man, adapt and adjust. It’s day three in the new surroundings and there are still electrical issues, phone issues, etc. If building maintenance hasn’t gotten to it yet today, why should I be up to speed any faster?
Nothing is as bad as it seems, nor as good. The smart move is to disengage. Not from the people, but from any conversation that focuses on my current situation and my current state of mind. I’m not ready to share productively, because I don’t have things right-sized yet. A day at a time.