Sometimes, my good mood snaps back upon itself with a vengeance. An instant gathering of all my negative thoughts and worries form an all-encompassing flash mob in my head. How dare I feel good? Why isn’t everyone else going along with my aura?
Step 12: having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.
Now I’m doing half of the opposite of what I always do and still expecting different results. I’m in rare-air today: I’m wrong-sized on the good side. I’m high on pink cloud. My shoes are filled with helium. It’s gonna be a great day. Everyone is constantly going to be experiencing revelations of love and happiness and peace and understanding. Who in their right mind would have other plans?
But see, I’m still imposing my will. Thinking it’s okay because I’m with the good guys this time doesn’t excuse my assumption that people are ready to line up and sing and dance to my happy tune. It’s not that they’re in a bad mood, they’re not; they’re just not aware of my current fifteen-minute love affair with serenity.
And when my assumption doesn’t match up with reality, then here comes the snap-back.
For today: slow my roll. Recognize the pink for what it is: a fading shade of red, slowly turning white.
What I think that means: Everything changes, if you wait long enough. So don’t get caught in the moment entirely, be it good or bad.