“Spiritual Awaking” and “Carry this Message” where the only two phrases in the 12 Steps that struck odd chords for me. In my head I conjured a tent pole preacher spinning his loafers in the dust, slapping the dirt, rising up in time to praise Jesus. And sell his magical elixir.
Step Twelve: Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.
How do I know I’ve had a spiritual awakening? It seems rather boastful; proclaiming the program worked and I’m now all slathered in spirituality.
Why can’t I acknowledge I’ve had a spiritual awakening when I had no problem admitting a liquid was controlling my life? If I was able to admit I was powerless over alcohol and that my life had become unmanageable, how, then, do I explain the fact that I am not drinking 24 / 7 today? Something has happened that for almost twenty years I deemed concrete impossible.
And it’s happening a day at a time. Having a spiritual awakening doesn’t mean I stop growing. The program isn’t over. Everything is just starting. After all, I just woke up.