This was sent in response to an e-mail I had sent:
“The proposal clearly states that they do no want this to be about what they sell, but rather…”

I stopped reading at “clearly states”.

I’m attempting a month of humility:
Humility simply requires a man to think of his abilities and his actions as no greater, and no lesser, than they really are. Real humility then mandates that a man knows and is completely honest with himself.

Let’s start with “clearly”. The word all but drips with insinuation. Any person less dense than myself would have easily gleaned the meaning: it was clear, obvious.

And “states.” Is the e-mailer worried that I’m illiterate?

It’s a slight, pure and simple. So, how much time is appropriate getting upset about it? Speechless and offended? 5 minutes. Forwarding e-mail to confirm it’s a slight, receiving the confirmation and then soaking in some righteous anger? 15 minutes. Responding to the e-mail without a hint of pettiness, which requires four re-writes? 10 minutes. The bulls*** notion of that e-mail and all its implications and tangents, etc., etc., floating in and out of my head every few minutes? 7 hours.

Or it would’ve been seven. I decided to bring humility to an e-mail fight. First off, I’m literally reading too much into this. Maybe nothing was meant by it at all – just a figure of speech. A humble man would let it drop there.

But maybe it did mean something – a minor critique on my abilities to discern. Hey, maybe I actually missed something. Or I simply saw it in a different way. Whatever. No skin lost, right? Sure, I’m ticked, defensive and unsettled; but that’s on me. I did that. Not those two words. My pride and ego demand retribution. Or at least exoneration.

Which isn’t humility. Because I went about it backwards. I tried to run through the whole emotional gamut to come to terms with the two words. Once that was over, I would let it go and wait for serenity.

All this, when my humility had already told me that the two words weren’t worth it.

One thought on “does not compute.

  1. Used to do the “e-mail” wars almost daily. Such a time waster. I could spend 1-2 hrs. on a single memo. Still can but do it much less often.

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